Tuesday, November 18, 2008

Reading the Headlines: Dr Pepper edition

Earlier, I wrote that Sarah Palin drinks Diet Dr Pepper. (Interesting fun fact. The other day I messed up her name and instead said Parah Salin. Parasailin'. Just the way she would say it if she were actually into such an elitist thing.)

And now, I am treated to this headline: "Once a Dr. Pepper addict, she lost 117 pounds." I have been called an addict, but I am nowhere near as bad as this lady. Quoting from the first page:

Kimmie, who owns a cleaning business, would drink 17 cans of Dr. Pepper (2,625 calories) and eat so much food – fatty carbohydrates like pizza, garlic bread and brownies – that she thought she would vomit.

SEVENTEEN? HOW CAN YOU AFFORD THAT? I can barely afford 2-3 cans a day. Jesus Christ! I mean, Dr. Pepper is hella good, but you'd have to buy six 24 packs a week. Where would you have room to put them all? You'd have to have a Dr Pepper shed out back at that rate.

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